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Friendship becomes emotional sex when the feel-good brain chemicals and hormones that are released when even thinking about that person take over.

But you are having emotional sex, and that can be even more intense, sensual and all-consuming than physical sex. Emotional sex is a friendship that escalates into something that feels the same as romantic love and can manifest itself in numerous ways -- physically, romantically, emotionally, lustfully, verbally, or virtually.

If you’re thinking about this approach save yourself some time and toss your phone into the nearest natural body of water because you are insane.

If you’re going to sext with someone at least have some sort of conversation first.

You become friends with the sexy co-worker and decide to carpool to work together. You're married, or engaged, or you're in a committed relationship. All those tingly feelings and the fantasies that perhaps a "perfect love" can really exist isn't destiny knocking -- they're caused by "love chemicals" in your brain.

You become "friends" with an ex on Facebook and reminisce about the past. You spend hours thinking about them and your heart races whenever you see a text from them. You tell yourself it's ok because you're not really cheating, you're just chatting. Biochemical research has shown that the effect of these love chemicals is twofold: they are released in response to your friend, and they bond you to him or her.

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These addictive love chemicals feel so good that it's difficult for you to even imagine ending contact with your friend.

Your connection feels genuine and even life-sustaining.

Letting go of such intoxicating nourishment seems unimaginable.

Before you are tempted to do something risky -- like leave your stable, good relationship for your exciting emotional lover -- it's important to examine what's really going on. There's a huge difference between a platonic friendship and a friendship that has crossed the line into the emotional sex danger zone.




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It is am and KFF just texted me for the first time since the last time it was cold. Yogurt soju and probably an awkward lead-up to hot sex. Anyway, the night trickled down to us in a soju room with a closed door and high walls around us. Now, I had no idea if they would love doing a shot or not, but I figured most Koreans out, at night, in a soju room, wouldn’t mind. (It doesn’t just have to be friends, it can also be dating agencies or parents doing the match-making.) Ideally, the friends know you well enough to know what sort of person you’d like, so the person they set you up with, should work out to be someone you’d like to be with.


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